Being sober is overated

The days of sobriety have gone past, not a suprise, it has always been a flash but the weeks of late have been hard agaisnt the wall at work and every other way. Never have i ever felt more drained and at a loss. There has been alot of change in circumstance and situations, we have moved into a new place and my job has taken a different path. If that alone is not enough there are other factors that keep me awake at night. It is sad to say that my only moments of release have been under the influence. Im not quite sure whats going on , or rather no else really knows.....